In God We Trust

Old Cowfarts

JD's 1987 Summer Vacation

John Michael had been visiting me for about four weeks and Mike came after him.

Mike talked me into going home with them... It was hot as hades. We had been up visiting my Folks all that day, into the night. I grabbed my old beat-up suitcase with a broken lock, loaded a few clothes, a colt .38 and old Webley .45 six guns.

After a night of eight hours of grueling traffic, we reached the little house on a dairy, they were renting. Mike and Carol turned on the airconditioner in their room and went to sleep. Michael said to sleep on his bed. It was about two foot, too short. And I quickly found out that Roxanne had been letting all the cats and dogs in the neighborhood in the house when both parents were working. FLEAS STARTED EATING me to death!

I got a recliner lawn chair and tried to sleep in the living room. Fleas everywhere! Awful!

Carol sprayed insect repellent and stunk up the house. Turned a big fan on, blowed out the fog. Finally got some sleep.

Durn, them kids letting in the ANIMALS!

Morning came. Mike went to work. Carol too. Me & Michael went on a hike to the woods. Saw where he had been camping & cooking with aluminium kitchen ware & explained to him that was the wrong stuff to stick on a campfire.

Hot as hell over there, not a breathe of air.

Night times, Mike would rent movies &Carol would bring home hamburgers & Dr. Peppers from the cafe she worked at. Carol's sister & kids would come over & we'd all watch movies, eat potato chips drink Dr. Pepper every night 'till midnight.

One night Carol's sister called up about 1:30 AM and in a terrible fright. The kids had let the horse get out, and wanted me to come catch it, since I'm a cowboy.

We drove about 10 miles somewhere to a neighborhood. I ran through everybodies yard & gardens for an hour trying to head it home. Being a stranger, it wouldn't let me get close enought to catch it. Finally, the Highway Patrol or some fancy lawman came by and run after it with the patrol car & I on foot disturbing the whole town.

Finally got it back home.

One day before Mike went to work he said for us to be ready when he came in bercause we were going to the famous Amon Carter art museum. We did. I saw the works of the famous Charley Russell & Frederic Remington. Most famous of all western artists of the last century. And European paintings. One was really impressive. It was done in the 15th century of a couple girls in costumes of the times. They were laughing and looking right at the viewer. Complete realism, perfect color, looking so fresh & alive to be so old. Also saw a statue that was once on the throne of Ramese II of Egypt, whom Moses had told to "Let my People Go!" As in Biblical text. So amazing to be near an object that Moses had touched or walked past!! Apart of history gravely important to all mankind!

One day we went to "First Monday," a huge mecca of flea markets covering downtown Weatherford. Hot as hell! But lots of fun. Everything on Earth for sale, lots of food & drinks. Great time. Couldn't afford to buy anything but enjoyed the party atmosphere. Good time had by all!

we also went to Azle, a huge flea market there too. Heard one of the sellers talking. He said last year he shot a black man right where I was standing for stealing a flashlight or something. They are extremely racial minded in them parts!!

One day before Mike come in from work, Michael decided to practise driving. He drove circles around the yard. He cut too close to car Mike had been restoring & had a buyer lined up. Slamm! He put a dent in the fender.

Needless to say, Mike was rather mad to say the least. Really madddd!! Purple mad!

The fourth of July came. Time for me to take a bus home. Roxanne, then about eight or nine years old cooked breakfast for me. Everybody else still sleeping... pancakes about 14 inches across and one and a half inches thick, but I got 'em down. Mike woke up looked over the deal & told her she was using three times too much pancake mix.

Got to the bus station in Weatherford about 9:30 a.m. buss boke down near Mineral Wells, was two hours late. Finally came, got aboard! Solid negroes crammed in ever seat. Squeezed in one with huge fat black woman about 300 lbs, reading "Jaws."

Come into huge, giant Dallas bus station. Scores of busses all with engines idling. Lots of noise. Hundreds of people. I was scared to death I'd miss the right bus. Asked the drivers where they were headed, but couldn't hear a word they told me, so damn much racket & I'm hard of hearing too. Saw a nice looking young gal in the same shape. She was running in a terrible panic trying to locate her bus. Really in a panic. Felt sorry for her.

Guess my guardian angle put me on the right bus, 'cause by then I think the effects of "lead" pancakes were ruining my pants. Mercy!!

On the bus was a young woman with a couple of kids. An assortment of hippy types and a Baptist preacher. Along the way a strange burr haircut fellow of about 30 years of age got on. He wore camo clothes. Had a Kung Fu mustasche, sat with head back chanting some sort of stuff to himself, looking weird.

One of the hippy types in back of bus was drinking a soda. He put the plastic bottle in the floor. I could hear it roll here & there as the bus moved. After a long while it come rolling up in front hitting the burr headed guy in the heel. The character went APE and started screaming at me, thought I was doing something to him. Cursed me loudly in he most vile way. Threaten to kill me. Got the bus driver really watching. I was stunned at first. Told him I didn't do a thing. Then I started getting mad.

By the time we got to San Antonio & stopped at a station that night I was ready for him. He went up to the lobby where they sell drinks, started a row with the girl. I head the bus drivers on the loud speaker saying "there's a mental defective on the loose!" I think they grabbed him & did something with him.

Got back to 3 rivers at about 1:30 a.m. Mother picked me up after I called her. Was sure glad to be back in the country!!

Signed: J.D. Bedwell

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